Florida Man Tells Police He Can't Go To Jail Because He's Half OrangutanNAPLES, F.L.--An assault suspect told police he couldn't go to jail because he is half Orangutan and the Director of the CIA. Police say Mark Loescher was arrested for pulling a gun on a woman when she tried to tell him his car was smoking. When police arrived on the scene they say Loescher was sitting in the car and wouldn't get out. He told police he needed to go to the "Fusion Center" to get his monkey blood. He then told police he was a friend of George Bush and Elvis Presley's brother. Police eventually arrested Loescher and charged him with aggravated assault with a weapon. |
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