Same Sex Adoptions On The Rise

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by Kirk Hawkins, Photojournalist Adam Stevens

Story Created: Nov 9, 2012 at 12:16 AM EDT

Story Updated: Nov 9, 2012 at 9:18 AM EDT

Mooresville, N.C.--Will came into the lives of Chad Shoaf and Jeffrey Shields 22 months ago."You know we just had to put our two feet in and go for it," said Chad Shoaf.

The couple adopted the toddler after preparing for more than a year, "The world has just turned upside down. It's completely a different world. Like everybody says. It really is. And it has been the best roller coaster, I've loved it," said Jeffrey Shields.

North Carolina laws don't allow gay couples to adopt. But, gay individuals can. Jeff adopted Will as his legal father. Chad was hoping to adopt as the second parent but second parent adoptions were outlawed statewide in December, 2010. It's one of the unique hurdles that gay couples have to clear in order to adopt.

"You have to look at things realistically. The way they are. Not the way they should be. The way we would like them to be. Very realistically this is the situation," said Helene Nathanson of Nathanson Adoption Services.

Some gay families have to navigate around mothers who prefer heterosexual parents. They also struggle with nickel and diming from mothers who come close to bribing the hopeful parents. "It's a whole lot of work. But, I don't regret any of it," said Shields.

Shoaf and Shields are now ready to relive their childhoods through the eyes of their
son. "That's the only thing I don't want it to do is fly by. I want to be able to watch it and enjoy it," said Shields.

The average adoption can cost upwards of 50-thousand-dollars. Experts say international adoptions are almost impossible for gay couples because the majority of adoption agencies in those countries don't think they are worthy.

 

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